Monday, January 26, 2009

Definitions of...


School:
A place where Papa pays and Son plays.


Life Insurance: A contract that keeps you poor all your life
so that you can die Rich.

Nurse: A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree
and a woman gains her masters.

Tears:
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower
is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer
to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Compromise:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Dictionary:
A place where success comes before work.

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Father: A banker provided by nature.


Boss:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Politician:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Committee:
Individuals who can do nothing individually and
sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise after death.

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